Tuesday, October 21, 2008

Most Embarassing Sports Illustrated photo. . .ever


Gotta love that Sports Illustrated "Vault" that one can spend hours and hours of time at work reading instead of working. . . only drawback is that even though EVERY issue of SI from the 1950s is available to read, very few of the photographs are on-line.

Fortunately, this super-duper image of Larry Bird from the late 1970s is. . . sorta looks like some cheesey College-themed porno DVD cover or something. . .

Speaking of Embarassing. . .

Ladies and Gentlemen, the President of the United States. . .

Here's a light-hearted moment after the third and final Presidental Debate. Which candidate do YOU think has a more presidential demeanor? And which one seems to be acting more and more like crazy Uncle Johnny the Vietnam Vet at the family reunion?

Though there's no telling how the "real-Americans" will finally decide to vote at the last minute, you've got to think that the McCain camp are feeling pretty desparate in these last few weeks until the election.

I used to like the guy--entertained even considering him for my vote last year. No longer. When folks like Colin Powell, Christopher Hitchens and dozens of previously conservative-leaning newspapers have endorsed Barack Obama instead of the increasingly hateful and mean-spirited McCain campaign (news flash, all you conservatives: ALL taxation is redistribution of the wealth. And if that is socialism, then I'd guess that even Ronald Reagan was a flaming red Socialist), you've got to feel that any support for McCain that isn't rooted among the hard-core Christian Right, red-meat-eating, flyover-state base is eroding away.

But who knows how this will turn out. One should never underestimate the stupidity of the American public.

Cowboys 4-3? Wha' tha' hell?


Excuse me.


And, again.


There, I feel much better.

Yep, seven games into the NFL Season (i.e. The Season The Cowboys Would Win Another Super Bowl) and things are not going well at Valley Ranch. I'm sure Jerry Jones' head is about to explode with rage. And poor little Wade Phillips. Sure, Bossman says your job is safe through the end of the year. . .but would you believe anything he says?

And Tony Romo? What a pussy. TO once played with a broken leg, for chrissake. Romo's no Brett Farve--he should suck it up, get addicted to pain pills, and learn to play with that broken finger. Pinkie finger. Whatever. On the same hand as the finger that will never wear a Super Bowl Ring.

I'm gloating. I'm in heaven. How much better could this be? Looking at the next few weeks, it's likely the Cowboys will by a 4-6 team. It's very possible they'll finish below .500. How sweet could that be.

All the stars are lining up for the collapse of that slimy weasel Jerry Jones' empire. A losing season. No chance of a Super Bowl Champion to open that new Billion Dollar stadium carried on the backs of Arlington taxpayers. A cratering economy. Fewer corporate fat-cats willing to pay $100,000 for Personal Seat Licenses.

When I was a kid, the NFL was THE sport to follow. Real warriors. Players so tough they had names like "Chuck" and "Bubba" and "The Hammer." Now what do we have? Millionaire panty-waists who celebrate a tackle with their team trailing by 20 points and change their name to Ocho Sinco. Give me a break. And it's 10 times worse living in North Texas.

It's almost worth being a Cowboy Hater just for the honor of listening to the constant hang-wringing, finger-pointing and crying on the area's sports radio channels.

It's a great time to be alive.

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