Monday, December 3, 2007

Danger Signs, Pt. 2



I'm always intrigued when I pass the above sign just south of downtown Fort Worth along I-35. This is not the nicest neighborhood in the city, ya know, and seeing a sign for body-altering surgery soaring high above razor-wired used car lots and industrial hydraulic businesses doesn't make me feel too trusting about the folks practicing their medicine here. The sign is rusting in places, and the building where the doctor's offices are is kinda shabby and run-down as well. I get the feeling the surgeons are largely catering to a clientele who can't afford the high-end doctors, such as this guy, below:

Now, Dr. Robert Rey is well known to millions from Dr. 90210. If one reads his website, he's got a highly successful practice in Beverly Hills, his own line of body-shaping lingere, and he's a member of the Screen Actor's Guild. I doubt the guys who run the clinic in the photo above have all that. They probably don't have perfectly styled hair, practice karate in their own gym inside a placial mansion, or wear sleeveless scrubs while performing boob jobs. Speaking of boobs: I've never really liked this guy. Look at the smarmy expression? And what's with the Miami Vice clothing? Pluheeze. Would you really want him doing your labial reduction? Watch a little of the show, and see if you don't agree that this fellow is one of the most self-centered assholes you've ever met. I doubt there's a sincere bone in his body. If there were a meteor headed towards the earth right now, it's be a toss-up whether I'd want it to land right on top of this guy, or on top of over-the-top-alcoholic-house-renovator Ty Pennington, seen left in one of his more intelligent poses. If I were to choose between the too-slick pretty boy and the cut-rate chop-shop docs in the hood to do my surgery, I might choose the guys in Fort Worth, right next to the transmission repair shop. Maybe while I'm recovering from my tummy tuck, Ty could come over, demolish my home, and build me a new one I can't afford the taxes on.